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What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Last Updated: 18.06.2025 02:40

What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Why is the world male-dominated?

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

TEXT:

Is it right to visit any shrine or tomb in Islam?

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

How does a single-payer healthcare system handle costs for surgeries, and what's the patient experience like compared to private insurance?

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Is it normal to hate my dog, but feel too guilty to get rid of him?

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

What’s the worst thing you caught anyone in your family doing?

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Methane-eating sea spiders discovered off Southern California coast - SFGATE

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

What are your darkest taboo confessions?

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

How do you feel about the impending end of what Donald Trump calls "the Green New scam"?

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Why do you suck men's dicks?

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

How should one handle an uninvited guest at a small, intimate wedding ceremony? Is it appropriate to ask them not to attend?

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Make Nazis afraid again!

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.